A few days ago a mom wrote to me and asked where and when I was speaking in Southern California. I informed her that I was speaking at Creekside H.S. Leadership Academy in Irvine and also Cal State Fullerton over the next few weeks.
The mom also thought that her daughter might not watch the Success4Teens DVD if she gave it to her, but that she might be more inclined to watch it in a “group setting”. I agreed with the mom that it was highly unlikely that her daughter would watch it for two specific reasons. 1.) it was provided by “the parental unit” therefore no good, and 2.) she ’s not motivated to succeed- only her mother is.
What’s more important was exploring the “group setting”. This is where I need to be real clear. My belief (as covered in my Success4Teens DVD) is that 95% of the people on the planet are not successful, and that’s because they are part of “the herd” or the “group setting”. And as we always said on Wall Street, the herd gets slaughtered”…!!!
Success, in my opinion, is very INDIVIDUALISTIC”. The success principles I laid out in “Formula for Success” aka. Success4Teens are for individuals to execute – NOT groups. The rules for success are proper time management, goal setting, knowing HOW to deal with setbacks and HOW to create a positive mental attitude…..these are done on an individual basis not a group basis. The DVD Success4Teens is meant to educate first, then inspire. Motivation comes when the individual employs the principles…!!!!
During my years on Wall Street, I was constantly in training at the Downtown Athletic Club. This training was an all around program I designed to get into top physical shape. Every year (for 5 years) I did a “sit-up-athon” to raise money for terminally ill kids affiliated with the Make-A-Wish Foundation. I would do these sit-ups and would get others to do them as well and we would get individuals and companies to pledge money for every sit-up achieved. Thanks to the generosity of the folks on Wall Street we were able to raise quite a bit and every penny went to the kids wishes. This actually started my speaking career, mostly to athletes, when I set a World Record for consecutive sit-ups (20,100 in 11 hours and 32 minutes).
Anyway, people always asked me what I ate while in training. I probably consumed 5000 calories a day, but also burned 5000 calories a day, which meant my weight did not change. One of the primary staples of my diet was PASTA. I have attached a great article by Lucy Danziger that is quite good, please enjoy.!!!
Eat Pasta, Drop Pounds!
By Lucy Danziger, SELF Editor-in-Chief
Ever tried to avoid carbs in order to lose weight and found they still follow you everywhere you go? At my favorite restaurant, the fettuccine on the menu taunts me; at my friend’s baby shower, the sandwich platter beckons much louder than the mixed greens. And in a business meeting, the cookies distract me. Whether it’s a basket of warm bread, a tasty pasta or tantalizing desserts, carbs can be hard to quit.
Thankfully, you don’t have to. Despite their reputation for helping pack on the pounds (remember Dr. Atkins?), certain carbs can actually help you feel fuller longer and fight fat. The key? Fiber—found in whole grains, oats, certain legumes and even popcorn! When people follow a high-fiber diet—at least 34 grams of fiber a day—they absorb up to 6 percent fewer calories, research shows.
Before you raid your breadbox, learn these two simple carb commandments to enjoy pasta and all your fave carbs and still peel off pounds.
Carb commandment #1: Look for whole grains. Unlike their white counterparts, whole-grain versions of rice, bread and pasta are high in satiating, fat-fighting fiber. Opt for whole-grain pastas and replace your usual loaf of bread with one that offers 4 to 5 g fiber per slice, says SELF contributing editor Janis Jibrin, R.D. For breakfast, nibble on whole-grain waffles. On pizza night, try whipping up a whole-wheat crust at home. Order brown rice with your Chinese stir-fry, and use whole-wheat tortillas on Mexican Mondays. These subtle (and scrumptious!) swaps will help you slim!
Carb commandment #2: No need to pig out—even on whole wheat! As with every nugget of nutrition advice, moderation is key. Fortunately, whole grains contain the same number of calories as refined or white carbs, but they serve up more fiber, so you’ll be satisfied with a smaller portion, says Madelyn Fernstrom, Ph.D., author of The Real You Diet (Wiley). Go ahead and have your Butternut Squash and Fried Sage Pasta, but serve it in a cereal bowl rather than a Frisbee-sized dinner plate and stick to a 1-cup serving. Mangia!
Now that you’ve swapped your default fettuccine for whole-grain and brown rice for white, check out this list of amazing grains on Self.com for more ways to fill your cart smart.
Setbacks are something that occurs in all of our lives. As I say before, if you look at my resume, it looks pretty impressive, you know as an athlete and working on Wall Street. I have been the CFO of a New York Stock Exchange company; I have been head of Mergers and Acquisitions for another NYSE company. I’ve had the ability to work in Europe and the Far East while working on the Street. But, if you looked at my list of failures, that would have been 10 times as long. Guarantee you. I probably fail four or five times before I get a hit. It’s just the way it is. But, I think what makes a difference in my life, is that, when I have a failure, let’s not call if failure, let’s call it setbacks, because a setback means you are going to continue working the issue. Failure means you quit. Big difference. A lot of teens I talk to around the country, when they get into a situation where they fail, they pack the tent, and say I’m out of here. It is never going to work again; I’m not going to do it. Kids will do that, they will pack the tent and quit.
What I am going to show you today is the process that you need to mentally think about, and remember we talked about a Positive Mental Attitude. All these are interconnected, positive mental attitude, dealing with setbacks, and goal setting. Fitness, it is all part of it; it is all part of how to become whole.
Let me talk about what I call my SARAH chart. There are many initials in that. If you can think in your life when you had a particular setback, it is kind of what happens. The first thing that happens is shock, sshhhttt, I couldn’t have got a D. There is no way. The second phase you go through is anger. This isn’t going to work. The third thing you go through is rejection. Now you feel bummed. Oh this just isn’t working out. Then you finally get into acceptance and then eventually you become healthy and happy. This is a process we all go through. This isn’t a specialized deal, we all go through it. The reason I did the first three in red is for a very specific purpose. When you are in those first three, you are like a deer in headlights. You are frozen, you are frozen in time. You cannot move, you cannot move forward. You cannot make things happen. There are a lot of people I deal with that can never get out of this phase. If you remember on our chart over here, rejection is right there on the 95% side. That’s the people that are coming from the dark. They feel rejected they want to blame. They want revenge. Those people avoid like the plague. When you are in the SAR zone, and we all go through it. How fast can you get through it? And what do you learn from it? That is what it is all about. Let me repeat that. It is how fast can you get through it and what did I learn from it.
by Bill Morris CEO- Success4Teens.com
It seems that since the beginning of time there seems to be a communication failure between the parental unit (mom & dad) and their offspring (son/daughter). Well, that’s because parents and kids, (a) speak different languages, and (b) have different needs, wants and desires.
For example, as a parent I might be concerned with paying my mortgage and getting along with my spouse, as a teenager I might be concerned about purchasing the next Snoop Dogg or Coldplay CD or possibly getting hold of the new Grand Theft Auto video game.
As a teenager it’s almost an unwritten law to question authority and work against the parental units, because it’s cool. It’s cool because as teenagers we think that mom and dad are “square” and if you are “square”, by definition you know very little.
So now comes the dilemma –“ HOW ” can I reach my kid and impart some common sense into their brain. Well, forget it. The harder we try the less we have to show for it and the more frustration we create for ourselves, which in turn effects us in a negative way. That negative effect snowballs and we are worse off than when we started.
So what is a parent to do? The reality is that our offspring is actually on “automatic pilot”, so, we as parents need to come in from another angle. We need to learn their language and we need to understand their needs. One thing most parents forget is that the “teen brain” is still developing and will until they are in their early twenties. You are saying I’ve tried to communicate with them, but “they/ the offspring” won’t “let me in”.
I always say: “If you always do what you’ve always done, then you’ll always get what you always got”. Think OUTSIDE the box this time.
Create “date night”. This is a night where one parental unit goes out for dinner with one offspring. The rules are simple:
(1.) the parental unit does not talk about school or the myriad of other “gripe issues” they have with the offspring
(2.) the parental unit only talks about how much he/she loves the offspring, no matter what ever happens in life
(3.) the parental unit endorses the fact that he/she knows the offspring will be successful regardless of whatever he/she does in life
(4.) the parental unit does not have an agenda, but rather is there to listen, and on date #1 there might not be that much to listen to.
(5.) the parental unit explains that the offspring can talk about anything they want without fear of reprisal (and mean it).
(6.) the parental unit will share some vulnerabilities (I know this is hard- but necessary ) like something about his/her job they are concerned with that the offspring did not know and maybe his/her spouse does not even know.
(7.) if date night is say Tuesday…..make it every Tuesday.
When I created the DVD Success4teens, a DVD showing kids HOW to “get it together” mentally, physically and spiritually, it was designed from the heart and soul of the parental unit.
After all, it’s not always the message they choose to ignore, it’s the messenger. Let me that messenger. Even if we say the same thing, they might be enamored with my background on Wall Street or that I hold a World Record in fitness.
This DVD is everything we want to say to our kids and more…….because we love them more than life itself, we want the best for them and shouldn’t care HOW they get the message.
In our heart and soul we know their success is our happiness!